28th september 2007

happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to you,
happy birthday to mummy,
happy birthday to you~~!!!

so sorry... again... cudnt celebrate your birthday with you....
but i hope you wont mind... ><>to be with you ... n oso with papa n wendy n tina...
bad mmu.. hehe:P

thx for being so supportive..
esp after d incident tat happened during 2nd sem of my beta year...
though i still cudnt get understanding from u...

n i oso noe tat there's alwz a thorn in all our hearts... after my rebellious action of tat time...
n i can c thru all of ur eyes that... i'm no longer being trusted like before
n i'm no longer being treated like d gal tat u all wil nvr worry about...

but still i hv to say thx for bringing me up...
for worrying me...
though i do feel irritating at times... cz i really get pissed off when i dun get d supportive ones around me..

however... it proves tat i'm not unwanted ah bi... my family concern about me... loves me... jz tat.. ppl do get frustrated when wat they want cudnt be approved...

but its ored past.... trust me... plz...
cz with no trust... d bond will really gone..
n i dun wan tat to happen.. =)
i'll try my best to do wat i shud do...

i'll be good... though things might come out differently..
but i'll overcome it.. blive me plz..
n if i ever cause u fell sick... i dun mean it... really dun mean it...

just wana say tat... plz dun hesitate to tell me wat's happening in our hse....
in your life... in you...
cz u still hv this three gals tat alwz will be with you... supporting you thru all the things..
although i'm the youngest... i'm still can be counting on... i'm not the black sheep...
neither wana be treated as one...

coz i alwz belive tat... we are the ones tat understand each other the most...

i'm glad to hear that you bek to your "wai dan gong" class again tis evening...
good for u.... at least there's sth to let you release out your stress n tension...
n it makes me feel tat i hv a lovely papa mama when jz nw papa actually told me tat he ored booked the badminton court to celebrate your birthday...
isn't tat romantic.. :P

mummy, i love you... daddy.. i love you too..
i miss you all so much...
i'll try my best de..

xingku ni men le~~~

恨不得快点长大
天下父母都这般期盼着我们啊
我们已健康成长
快来祈祷父母长命百岁啊
请记得要常回家看看爸爸和妈妈
简单的一顿饭他们也开心很久啊
随便聊一些话
或随意呆在家
父母的伟大是从不要求我们报答
生活的压力真大
爸爸妈妈多苦也撑起了一个家
我的一点点挫败
说历经沧桑仍微不足道啊
请给我多一点时间证明给你们看
请原谅我的能力有限再要努力啊
偶尔我没回家或工作到天亮
偶尔你慰问的电话让我充满力量
父母的伟大穷我一生也难以报答
我们要把握时光来疼爱爸爸妈妈

silence... i kill you

wana hv sum time to release tension??
bet mmu-ians do... :P
hahaha...
study week sux.... exam ??? lagi lah sux...
but... here's sth i got from my hsemate... :P
n it do cheers me up...
hope it cheers u up too....
SILENCE... I KILL YOU.... hahahahhhha

http://www.snotr.com/video/389

evaporated

happy mooncake festival...
hehe... yest... so surprise... dad called me...
n wished me happy birthday.. haha...
tat's so sweet of him wishing me happy birthday though it's d lunar calendar... :P
ahhaha..... but it's d warmest feeling i ever had... made me feel so touched...
thx dad for remembering it...
n thx for bringing me up...
xing ku ni men le....

trying my best to be tough... be strong...
not to be terrified by d nitemare...
not to disappoint them...
i'm jz like wearing a mask everyday...
getting tired of it.... tat's y i run...
run away from everyone...
hiding in tis tempo house.. tat at least.. i feel some comfort here...
but so sorry to mafan d two of u in d tempo hse...
sorry....

glad to hv all d wishes from everyone bout mooncake festival...
it really mean so much to me... for tis festival...
cz i luv it d most...
but when time pass..... seems like i getting more n more further away from it...
seems like no longer celebrating it...
no longer had d chance to get together with my luvable family.... to sit dwn together chitchat all nite long...
dun even hv d chance to actualy bek home.....
i miss home lots.....
i miss papa mama lots.....
haiz.....

pre-course registration ... noob la...

woke up at 6am tis morning...
duh... i wonder y i wake up so early tis morning....
end up?? haha.. watch charmed again... :P
dui bu qi papa mama ar... :P

then?? check result for EMG... whew... luckily still not tat bad... :P
then?? check the schedule for my pre-course registration...
according to my fren, as what he sent to me tat day... all gamma foe will hv to register course on today... 9am.....
but i cudnt get my schedule for pre-course registration till tis morning.. ><
and guess what?? mine is at 26th... what d hell...
today is 24th~~!!!!!!
one word.... WEIRD......

cudnt check with the person in charge as it's so damn early.... hw to check wor??
aiks.... so gotta wait till 9am....
still putting sum hope on mmu system... n so... i tried to register like what my other frens did...
n it's proven tat... i'm not suppose to register like them... cz mine is on 26th and d system ask me to double check my schedule..
so i made a call to Pn Norazlina...
too bad... she ask me to refer to the exam unit...
aiks.... wat la... i damn ganjiong ad... ><
then... after lots of attempt to get thru d line of exam unit... finally sumbody picked up d call...
n it's confirmed tat... they hv put me under the wrong group...
><
SWEAT~~!!!
damn tired la... being send here n there ><
end up i cudnt register to the group tat i wish to... :( sob...
i cud only manage to join d other group... haiz...
nyway... thx fuyo, jimui, tomato for cheering me....
but i'm really pissed off tis morning.. ><
hope i can get thru all tis =)

I M daMn duMb....

MY 22/09/2007
~~545pm~~
since monday... study ect......... non stop...
end up macam learn nth... ><
pok gua... pek cek... feel like wat i did is jz wasting my time...
arghhhhh...
stupiak....
y so duMb............

~~7pm~~
go shifu's birthday party lo... (+hse-warming)
gotta say..... i had fun... though i really feel awky.... awky cz... hmm...
i'm out of d gang...
let's put it tis way....
there's sum gang in them... but they are clos to each other...
however..... the gangs there... not to say gang... i shud put as similarities.. :P
there's foe delta.... but i'm in foe gamma.....
there's mescorp.... but i'm nt even d wc......
there's fom gamma.... but... i'm gamma too bad not fom....
there's CNYE..... both 9th & 10th..... but i'm neither the two of them.....
n sum sum other similarities tat i cudnt get myself into it....
n tat's y.... when most of them c me... almost all of them ask d same Q:
"y is karen here??"
kinda feel out of d world for d first time...
my social life doomed bcz of my age?? haha... :P getting older i bet...
nyway.... luckily still got d other three pretty gals for me to chitchat with... thx a lot...
at least not so left out... for sum time...
:)
d hse is nice... d gang is nice... d atmosphere is nice... but i jz cudnt let myself feel "uhm"
though it's really cute of them having fun there... though drunk ad.. :P
but... no regrets going there... .thx shifu.. :)
then yumcha at MURNI...
to let those drunken ones... clear their mind a bit.. :P hahaha
sorry to jimmy n tony... i really too tired ad... so i talk without processing d words in my brain...
so kinda strait4ward when talking yest.....
sorry.. :)

MY 23/09/2007
~~ 430am ~~
finally i'm home... :)
fainted...

~~ 124 5pm ~~
chipmunks ringtones had rung....
i jumped up from my bed... GOODNESS..... it's 1245pm....
really doomed la tis time.... cz i got a real terrible nitemare.... ><
summore wake up at tis time... makes me lagi moody.....
i dreamt tat i lost d most important thingy in MMU... which end up will make my whole family suffer... n make myself disappoint my family...
d incident tat i most terrified of.... alwa pray tat it will nvr happen on me...
but... it's so real.... plz dun happen....
n si tortoise.. i dun mean to mafan u wake me up.. really thankful tat u called me... thx...

~~0130pm ~~
library-ing..... blog-ing.... sigh-ing......

awake.......

wow...
ect n ecp ... these two really killing us....
stay awake for all nite.... not only me... but my whole groupmates...
kesian...
i wish i'm clever enuf to contribute sth....
end up none.. :(
cud only stay awake with them doin nth.. :(
aiks... so cham

thanks chiao er... teaching thru d phone on ect assignment.... hehe... tat's so nice of u...
thx wei jie n alan come our hse help out ecp assignment.....
thx si ginna for chatting with me.... at least i can release a bit tension... :P

stress gao gao... dunno hw to do so many stuffs...
bhm test?? only noe hw to do management part.. :|
aiks.....
cham liao la....

gastric...

gastric gastric gastric..
i wonder y la..
aiks...
nyway.... it will be gone sooner or later....
i wont let it last for long. ... ish...

hade a great heart to heart chatting session....
nice one... haha..
as if chatting to my ownself...
at least.... gastric fade a bit....
pain in d heart fade a bit....
no more pek cek liao.. :P
thx yo... u noe who u r...

still got long long way to go....
hard one..... ecp, ect, bhm...
whew.... three of them....
i really nid to boost up my spirit... jiayou jiayou jiayou...
no more time to think of all those stupiak sickness liao...
kanasai sickness that wasted my puberty.. hahha:P

tml is another new day...
hope tat everything will be fine...
to everyone around me... :D
esp popo....
miss u alll

sick

oh no....
seems like... really d signal has been lights up...
today... again... not feeling good...
luckily jack brought me to clinic.....
n end up??? ya... same prob like wat alwz happen to d gals in our family...
which is maternal side...
low blood pressure...
n nw?? it's my turn....
it kinda scares me.... cz it's not so good.... n it is really bad to have that...
as i kinda getting weaker n weaker..
evryday feeling dizzy... couldnt stand up for long....
lousy me... haiz....
but i guess it's in my blood..... i mean d symtoms...
at 1st.... i planned not to let mama noes...
mana tau..... thru wendy... she noes it...
i asked wendy not to tell mum... cz i just wana ask wendy sum Q about wat happen to her last time.. n wat mama ask her to prescribe ....
nyway..... i hope i can get well...
cz bcz of tis loow blood pressure..... i wasted a lot of time...
n my health condition is getting worsen... n i got gastric n sore throat.... dizziness....
jiayou ar...

morning morning~~~ it's a brand new day again...
gotta work things out...
feel tat time nt enuf for me to spend...
aiks....
mayb i'm jz greedy?:P
nyway.... i will jiayou jiayou.... :D
watever happen is ored past...
gotta face d world with a smilling face.... bravest heart...
cannot let papa mama worry ...
colours are bek to blogspot again... yeah.....
independent day of ah bi
ahahaha

stupiak..

recently, i just encountered sumone that behaves so alike me...
the characteristics, the behaviours, the attitudes, the temper, the actions,..... n all ...
so stubborn... till i can hardly believe that "oh shit.. i'm jz like talking to my ownself..."
but... i shud say... he is more like the old me.. hehe..
cz i tried my best to change d old me... d stubborness ad...
n so....
how i wish i can help him... just at least change the bad temper of his..
hmm... at least noe wat's getting into him... wat makes him so pek cek...
cz it makes me feel bad... feel sad oso...
so i get pek cek too..
as i noe... it is really san fu for one to handle the prob all alone...
aiks.. :P
so end up....
it makes me think of "out of my sight~!! out of my mind~!! "
cz i blur ad...

it's kinda weird

hmm...
somehow.... it's jz weird...
but i think i'm alrite la..
hehe....
jz be a happy child in tan family~
jz be a gesiao fren in my frens' world~
ah bi jiayou...

dumbness

dah lah dumb... bodoh lagi...
really dumbodo la... :(

feel so dumb.... so numb....
thx khoon khoon, eng eng...
so late still go eat icecream wit me... then go swing ... summore halau by security...

things jz changed...
it mayb to d better for d others...
but nt for me...
i jz hope for a better karen.... cz it's nt good to get emo all d time yoh...
hehe...
nyway... it wont last for long la..
as long as i still noe there's at least one person whoever he or she is...
cherish my existance...

i miss home lots...
especially at tis time....
when it's my weakest time....
which i lost all my reliance on others...
on d one i trust...
trust no more..

terrified

somehow... it just scares me...
though all of us shud be mentally prepared bout tis...
i had a hectic week... a real hectic one..
tat made me hv to cancel going for my chinese orchestra practice for the performance on saturday, cancel my chinese orchestra class with my juniors, cancel goin for salsa class, on air with my juniors and workshop for 10th anniversary and last but not least the volunteer work that i've alwz wish to join in MIFC...
i truly apologize for all these.... i'm sorry

when i though that i nearly can put an end on the bad performance on my two tests tis week,
friday which was yesterday, when i went for a proper lunch which i had missed for the week, i got a call from wendy..
i answered it happily as i miss her since i hardly hv d chance to contact with her..
but d tone of d sound that i had from her was so gloomy.. so stress.. so sad.... so scares me...
she talked about grandma... she talked about she rushed bek to muar d day before as grandma barely breath... she mentioned about grandma's condition which sound so alike with wat had happen few years ago on gu gong.... and then she mentioned about... grandma might leave us in any second...

goodness.... tis is a real blow to me...
i dunno hw to handle it... cz it's jz scares me...
i was petrified tat time... i wish there's sum1 tat i can actually count on to.. tell me wat i shud do..
which might be silly to others cz it might be sth easily taken by those tat ored mentally prepared..
but though i look like one tat might be strong... yet i'm not..

i tried to breath deeply... stay calm... n then ask further Q to make sure tat she's clear bout wat she's talking about...
n wat i get is true...
"u better get bek muar whenever u can... cz she's really weak... which anyone of us dun wana hv any regrets, rite?"
then i hold my tears... to stay calm n think of d solutions....

she felt sorry tat she cudnt stay for long in muar... coz she had work to do... summore in bangkok...
but i'm in msia... i'm in cyberjaya... i shud b bek home...
n so i did... i plan it... ya... plan it..
i called my dad who is in bali... to ask him whether i can hv a ride on his bus... then i called tina...
then only i got to noe that i'm d only one who noes nth....
cz i'm having midterm tests n all... n mum dint wana tell me bout grandma's condition...
n so... i decided to folo tina's car bek muar on d next day which is today...

we reach at bout 5pm.. then we strait away go to grandma's hse...
mum was coughing badly... she lost her weight... look pale...
uncle oso look tired...
when i walked into d hse... i saw grandpa sitting on d chair he used to sit bside d telephone facing grandma which was lying on d restchair.. trying his best to observe her every movement.. to fulfil her every need...
then i approach grandma....
she was awake tat time when i squat dwn n talk to her...
she still has d smile on her face... still worry bout my mum's cough... ask me to take k of my mum... but i saw her tears at d edge of her eyes...
she's so skinny.... she's so weak...
she cant even feel her feet... she can only feel numb on her feet...
cudnt stand... cudnt eat...
but at least... i'm glad tat she still noes me...
she will still stay awake for sumtime... not as bad as wat wendy mentioned to me...
cz tat's really bad if tat happen again...
but we jz hv to alwz be prepared for d worst....

mum talked bout wat had happen two days ago...
which they thought they might hv lost grandma....
grandma fainted.. n all of them cried....
but thank god... she stil here....
still here.....
not another blow for us....
pray for u, popo

trust no more...

sui things alwz happen together...
laptop kena virus after i reformated my laptop for less than 5 days.. aiks...
then SIG2 lab report... aiks...
then trusting d wrong person....
sumore two.... aduhai...
realy cudnt blive such a fool i m...

nyway..
cudnt be able to bear myself fr trusting them again...
repeatedly being cheated...STUPIAK..
nyway.... jz let them b...
god noes... i wish .. hehe..
thx for d caring from mlc frens... gamsiah.. :)
really wish to bek mlc soon...
n thx yan ... sorry let u worry....
n oso thx tomato..
for all d songs... really nice.... :)

n i luv one of d lyrics... hehe....
share to all view my blog la....
whoever stress.. jz find me.. hehe..
hope d songs i hv will cheer u all up:D
jiayou.....

here goes....

闭上了眼睛感觉
我们的容貌都有些改变
在挣扎中学会了谅解
再多的眼泪都已是昨天

乘着风我们飞越 艰难的时间
梦因有土地植根而完全
我们迎接
全新的这一页
感谢你我能够写下自己的明天

若不是你 我怎么会看得见
每个梦想在实现之前 都需要起点
如果我会很幸福 因为你在守护
虽然你沉默的就像一棵树

若不是你 我怎么面对考验
只有你继续给我力气走向全世界
除了万分的感恩 对你的心也真
若不是你 我怎么能够完成这未知的旅程

raining

these few days d weather as if picturing my mood...
up n down... uncertain... unstable...
yest i burst out so many things to gundu...
unexpected tat it will actually happen tat i throw out all d stuffs in my blog into him...
i wonder too.. nyway... speechless to describe it..
jz feel tat... mayb i shud do so.. since it's awkward...

nw.... studying emg.... feeling so lonely... so lost...
i knew tat watever i did yest dint ease myself at all...
sum sort of like... it's an action to ease him rather than me...
i dunno y i hv such thinking....
but it jz happen to appear in my mind tat watever i did watever i say is jz to let him noe tat i'm stress.. n i really do...

at tis time around... as wat i told him...
i really dunno who to turn to...
i nid sumbody to guide me.... sumbody to assist me thru...
it mayb thought vr foolish of me on others' sight...
but it's jz too much for me to handle....
n of cz i noe tat i hv no right to ask sumbody to share d stress with me...
as i hate myself doing so... cz it's jz not right for wat i think...

getting thru d obstacles is my responsibility...
noone shud be drag into tis matter...
but i'm jz too tired.... so tired....
feel like wana split myself into pieces..
crack my head into pieces....
i'm such a useless bum...
good for nothing....

jealousy alwz strikes me these time around...
it's such a shame.... y is it strikes me...
n i finally got d answer...
i alwz yearn to be cared.... to be loved... to be pampered...
yet when i get it... i'll run... i'll hide....
cz i'm afraid to lose everything...
chicken hearted....

how now~

泪光

因为爱所以懂得珍贵
我的心从此就不为谁
爱一个人费尽千山万水
有你梦就不坠~
经过那一段冰冷风霜
我闭上双眼找爱的方向
有微笑的回忆不费思念
看见世界最美丽的花
于是我不再有忧伤不再有惆怅
闪动的泪光是爱的接待
你是我命中的光芒坚强的力量
把爱都点亮让幸福温暖怏怏

发现爱

发现爱

林俊杰+金莎

叽叽喳喳路人小孩
噘嘴的你站在露台
阳光眯着眼看我们
同时也发现爱
嘀嘀咕咕我该不该
让你看穿
冰淇淋的默契就是爱

努力想藏这刻曼妙
不觉中悄悄融化了
变成最幸福的味道
忘了烦恼可爱多好
不需要说什么
呼吸之间就尝到了你我
心电感应
我看见loves
in the end

丘比特胡闹唠叨的月老
缘分来了他们谁也管不了
就放手去爱
loves in the end
花开得很好风吹得很好
只要你在什么都好
爱的香味随空气飘

呜喔~~~

hungry

today do lots of things..
finally.... manage to meet yi chong... edo... aaron...
wow... all d spb-ians.. so glad tat u all still remember me:D
hehe... but so sorry tat i hv to go n meet d korean... so cant chat for long...
nyway... really glad to c u all again:D

then... when i reach FOE... BR1020~ they are actually having their social gathering..
wow... it's cool:D
hehe... all d local fruits are there..
n today i manage to noe another new gal named sae hae..
she told me tat her name actually means "happy new year"
wat a meaningful name she has:D
hehe...

then as wat we plan... we went to hb and hv lunch...
luckily the shops are open:D
hehe... after the lunch break.. it shud b d buddy system... but too bad... it's midterm break.. many havent come bek.. so they postpone it..
and replace d thing with their preparation for presentation on coming monday...
n i requested to be in d computer lab.. hehe..
and it was granted.. so nice:D
hehe... thx sir...
n i helped kil kil n ping sang to do their slides on soju.. hehe..
they perform well:D thumbs up

after tat they hv their briefing on homestay for one hour..
i use tat one hour to wander around at campus...
then after tat go n join their dance practice..hehe...
so kepoh la me:p
ahhaha.... but i really feel happy today..

hungry hungry..
hehe... no apetite tis afternoon.. so eat a little bit only...
so.. nw hungry hungry after d dance lo....
luckily i brought bek lots of stocks.. :D hehe...
cooking...


it's meat n vege.. :D
hehe.... just simple cooking to fill in d stomach...
kla..
time to wash d dishes...
chaoz:D
happy day

7th August 2007

today is papa's bday...
i feel so useless...
suddenly lost all d ideas on hw to help him celebrate..
supposaly it shud b a day to b happy...
to hv joy n cheers around with him..
but i lost my might...

i woke up late tis morning...
dint manage to send him d earliest wishes..
it's my fault... again...
sorry....
i cud only send a sms to send my truthful birthday wishes to u, my dearest papa..

then.. time to visit popo...
wasn't tat down yet... coz i still dunno wat has happened...
then on d way to d hospital... mum chatted with me...
told me wat had happened all tis while when i was at cyberjaya..
n wat had happened actually tis morning...
n i lost my might to console mum..
i dunno wat to do...

one of d nurses or mayb d doctors told popo tat she actually having cancer...
she has been told by us tat there's nth wrong with her health all the time cz we hope tat she will be kept from d news bout having cancer so that she wont think negatively.. losing d will to strive hard to be healthy...
but.. tis morning.. d secret being revealed..
popo burst into tears...
she cudnt accept d fact..
she lost her will.... lost hope...
i can c mama actually feel vr sad too..
yet she has to tell me tis with such a calm tone...
pretending tat she's ok... she's alrite...
there's nth i can do...
or i shud say... i dunno wat i shud do...

when visit popo... i can c tat she wish to bek home...
hoping tat d doctor can let her discharge...
we wish too.. but her condition does not allow her to be bek home with us.. i feel so sorry...

after visit popo.. i went to fetch gong gong go cut hair...
i was scolded for driving badly by gong gong..
i hold my tears... cz i ored tried my best to do everything..
i really lost d direction.. i dunno wat shud i do...

i hope i can be strong gal..
be tough gal..
a gal tat can b relied on by my parents..
but it's so hard..

wat a day

jz woke up from nap....
si gundu said nap is good... so mah try lo...
mana tau... end up nw headache..
no mean to say u r bad la.. haha:P

but today really nt my day...
tis morning got SIG2 lab...
damn sui la.... haih
ppl do three stimulation ad... my first stimulation still dun wana come out..
keep on giving me errors..
errors which even d lecturer oso dint noe hw to solve.. stupiak !
then? keep on redo lo....
end up... lecturer said " i think u better do d next circuit first."
then do d next one lo...
mana tau.. less than 5 minutes done...
argh..... stupiak...

relieved... got d graph ad....
mana tau... when i ask d lecturer to come n gv me d marks..
d sot pc.. hang jor...
argh...... y la like tat...
luckily d lecturer saw tat i really got do d graph..
so she said i nid to redo one for her.. then she'll gv me marks for other graph stil..
whew....
then evaluation part...
hmm... i forgot d answer...
then only get 0.5...
but still relieved tat got 4.5 over 5 marks... :D

hope tat everything will be fine later for my test at nite :(

jiayou!~~

everyday open laptop then will c tis

dunno hw they doin leh??
hope all are fine.... :D
cz cant hv the time to meet them....
jz like wat kong write in his status msg....
i miss d camp too...
wat a bout u??

feast~ stupiak in nid of food..

haha...
today eat damn a lot of food... why?
coz ar... tension gua...
haha.. summore tat stupiak ECT so hard to understan..
so mah treat myself nice food lo.. hehee...
for my brain :P
===> photo taken at sumwhere at FOE...
while waiting for my junior for yangqin... :P
wahahhaha

afternoon.. hmm.... i dint take pic... cz too rush ad...
it's actually frozen food from mama's kitchen...
haha... mama prepared it ad.. then frozen it..
n all i nid to do is jz heat it up...
yummy yummy... delicious.. :P
it's chicken wings with potato n oso sum gravy... muacks..

then go class eat /? haha... ROTI BOY...
so paiseh ... dare not eat from d packet..
so peel it with my finger..
but... not so nice.. cz it's not freshly made ad..
ored put there for a long time... but still got d smell la.. haha...


evening.... HUNGRY ar... in nid of food man~~
here it comes...
d snacks house delivery.. only cost me RM4.50 then i can eat till u can only see my teeth when i smile... hahaha... or i shud say.. cant hear my voice cz i very concentrate in eating.. ahhaha
tis is it.. d special nasi goreng ... but i wonder y it's so spicy cz i ask for d non spicy one..
anyway.. it tastes great... :D


then ar.... got d sms from si gundu tat he went to baskin robbins...
hmm.... ice cream...
since he so nice.. haha.. n i so greedy..
so ask him dapao for me..
cz i cant go out... got too many things to do...
n gv it to me at nite lo...
i jz finish d twinberries...
haha... he said wat twinberries better than uniberry..
hope tat wont get syntax error.... wat d hell.. ahhahha... study too much ad...
nywya.. gamsiah a lot for d treat yo:D

i think tat's all gua...
ahhaha...
got to sleep
tml got lab yo...
jiayou :D

~ wish weird weird mood good good ya... :) ~

ECT2036

I'M BORING....
sien kah....
no mood study ad..
i spent more than 2 hours in understanding one Q....
holly shit...
arghh.......





tis is wat stupiak ect2036 did to my table.... so messy...
arghh....
geramnya...
hate to c my table so messy...






& tis is wat it did to me...
craziness n sampatness..
both attack...
double tim...
arghh...


kla.. sampat enuf ad... time to study...
jiayou a~~~

HAPPY

let's guess... who is local??? who is korean???
haha... no matter wat it is.... we are best frens... happy.....
















peace..... can even see d bottle of so jiu... hahahah

















great n wise ppl here... hehe...
nice to noe u all....

these are wat i do today...
here goes... ~~~ :

duh~~~
thot can finish study today..
end up?? hahaha..
afternoon makan barli with tat 3 fellos~ bimbo, wong kok, zhen zhi wei...
then study bit bit nia...
nite??
haha... HAPPY~~!! yumcha with korean...
yeppee~~!!

they brought d alcohol... haha
from korea yo.... as i noe..
there're 10 bottles... 1.5 litres...
then... they finish 2 few days ago...
today they finish d third one at oldtwn yo... haha...

they are so frenly... so cute...
though damn tired.... though hard to communicate...
but no boundaries btween all of us...
so... good days are ahead.. karen~~
jiayou oh....
enjoy ur days......
aza aza...

dizzyness

jz found out tat... d last post was d 100th post in my blogspot..
good job karen... hahaha
clapz...
:p

sot jor.. hehe...
yest feel so dizzy...
today head so heavy...
duh duh... wat happen??
so end up... today jz keep on eating fruits nia... other things... all "gim chui"
haha.. :P

so call fruit feast la.. hehe:P
got red apple, green apple, dragon fruit, jack fruit.....
haha... so many...
thot can eat whole afternoon.. mana tau...
less than half an hour... finish ad..
haha.... so sad...

NVM.... i got cook barli... hehe
yummy yummy... cz mama gv me bai guo, n oso pandan leaves...
great ya~~!
kla.. time to study...
hw nw....
feel so sick

happy but tiring FRIday..

yeppeee...
luckily mynn woke me up tis morning..
actually ored noon.. haha:P
n i manage to wake up at 1130am then get ready to meet the korean...
to my surprise... most of them are older than me...
anyway... age is not a big prob in communicating.. since they are all so frenly n sampat... oops..
hahaha... but it's nice to hv d chance to actually mix around with them...

somehow... i find that they eat too little...
haha... even for d guys... they eat d same amount of food or i shud say lesser than wat i eat..
is it bcz i eat too much??
maybe... :P haha... but... d korean gals... OMG.. they took so little of food yet they dint finish it....
i wonder hw they can cope with d hectic day with such little intake of food.. :P
hehe... if for me... i'm sure i pengsan ad.. haha

oh ya.... n to my amaze, we actually hv d similar game which i dunno hw to name it..
haha... cz it's sort of like... hmm.. all the ppl gather in one circle..
then when d number that u speak when it's ur turn have number 3,6,9 then u hv to clap ur hand without saying out d number...
sth like tat... haha...
it's fun.... :P nice ice breaking..
hehe

then... it's time for workshop...
no comment on tis... hahaha...
cz we actually walk door to door promotion for tml event...
tis is d first day i bcome wc of 10th anniversary... though it's ored quite a long time ago punya event...
anyway... nice to play around with them... hehe...

ARCHERY TIME~!!!! hoooooorayyyyyyy
today.... damn tiring...
first time i shoot so many arrows...
hand no energy ad.. hahaha..
but i really learn a lot.. :P
hehehe...... n i feel so HAPPY...
i got d shot on 9 marks.... yahoooooooooooo
shud gv myself a treat then... hahaha:P

n then workshop again.. hehe:P

nw??? blogging lo...
hope tat everything is fine in muar.. :D
jiayou oh.....
rest~~~
tml is another new day:D

great thursday...

my 2nd MC experience...
AGM for CLS ...
a big mess.. for me la.. :P
anyway... it's an experience indeed...

watever it is...
it's a happy day in d week again..
hehe...
so call yumcha day which means d gathering for my campers..
hehe.... so nice.... really appreciate n cherish them so much....
it really mean a lot to me.... though being teased... but stil i feel warmth... i wonder y...

||| group ya... haha...
president ~ MR BIMBO; VP ~ MR BANANA...
n d rest of chart... awaiting for election...
hahahha:P

so nice to noe u all...
cya every thursday nite:D

outing

hehe...
last year tis day... wat m i doin leh??
it seems to be i ored getting older n older.. jz dun feel like admitting it
hahaha... wat to do.... :P
klo... getting more matured :P
nyway... 22/7/07 ~ again.. i helped fcm ppl in their assignment...
tis time... more fun... cz i'm able to get crazy n sampat for d whole day...
release tension mah.. hahahha


thx for juin hau.. fetching me n jeff go campus to meet them...
while waiting... hehe i intro jeff to chang shun(the photographer of d day) then we chit chatted..
it's nt quite a nice day though coz it rains non stop...
but jz take it as a challenge.... hehe..
it's not as easy as u thought ya.. :P
then i played d camera for a while... shooting here n there :P

finally, the car came.... it's a green myvi...
happily we start our journey....
but less than 2 minutes, the car bump into d side of d road near hb3... aiks...
PAIN~~
i can c d face of d driver(d model for another photographer) totally change into darkness...
it's time to stop talking... tis is wat i thought...
then d whole journey.. hmm i felt tat it's quite scary la.. :p
hehe....but i did make fun of myself n oso sum other ppl
hehe... e.g. i phoned uncle nel.... just teasing him for nothing.. haha... kesian him :P
then talk craps... n of cz... not to forget... ss-ing ... hehe
and d following are d happy 3 frens :D




















1st station~~ KL sentral...
hmm...." i'm singing in d rain~~ i'm singing in d rain...." tis is d song played in my brain...
but .... there's another song played in jeff," under my umbrella.... ella... ella.... "
hahahhahahahah......... goodness.... we had fun, don't we?? changsun, jeff and me...
we went to hilton n meriden...it's just too bad that it's raining...
aiks... if not sure we can take more pics.. hehe...
so end up we were jz ss-ing.. hehe...
i still remember i luv to play d "nxt station is ... plz press d button to open doors" haha.. inside d lift...
then we were so shocked tat d doors in hilton all will open itself de.. haha...
then sampatness striked changsun, he was thinking tat sumbody will be knocked out if he stand too near to d door.. hahahahhahhaha

here are sum of d pics at 1st station of d day...




in outside hilton..... where all d leng leng car will park at there...
but it's jz ss-ing cz it's indoor~ hehe..
cz we nid to take at outdoor..
but it's raining...







n d act cool jeff... jz wont choi me...
no smile in d pics... no tis no tat..
ahha...
he kena scolded by d ppl there for squating at tat spot..
oops.. hehe

SS-ING

under d rain....
two of us playing around with flowers n leaves...
stupiak... haha:P






and here comes d shaolin kongfu
haha... sot jor...
too sien ad...
raining... cant do anything to stop it...
so jz playing around at hilton







IT'S D WASHROOM AT HILTON
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL INSIDE...
HAHAHAHAHHA








the last photo we took at our first stop...
i'm scolding ppl... hehe...
sampatness man~~




NEXT STATION IS~~~
hmm... sum place where i named it as pusat masjid..
haha... cz got lots of mosques there..
but we dint take pics there...
cz ... i oso dunno :P
hehe.....










1st n 2nd pics look d same... ahaha
jz tat 1st one... i'm d robber....
2nd one??? jeff is d robber... duh...
hahahhahah:P so .... hmm... hehe.. dunno? think it urself la.. :P












n tis one?? hehe.. it's d before n after... :D
created by chang shun... haha... :P











haha... i like tis one... :P cz it's CUKUP FUNNY man~~ :P
it's d traffic light :P
first is d red light... ya... u r not allowed to do anything... but stand there n wait for d green
then?? the second... let's walk... when it's green... hahaha
it's d way hw u hv to cross road to dataran merdeka.... oooo ... hehe

haha.. it's d ss+group photo of ours again in d car... on d way pergi sumwhere find another car punya ppl ni... :P
hehe...



last but not least.... d last photo of d sampatness on tat day...
haha...
i got kick on my ass...
goodness...
:P



i did enjoy my day on tat outing...
though lots of things happen..
nyway... thx for asking me changsun...
n thx for helping... jeff...
hehe... hope u all oso enojy a... :P

and tat's hw it ends

orientation camp ~ play & learn camp ~

thru out thick n thin.. we finally made it a success one...
bravo everyone...
still remember three months ago i had my EDS which cause me fall dwn so deeply...
then alvin approach me to help the orientation series event...
i rejected it coz wana concentrate on EDS...
end up... hehe... EDS will nvr ever appear in tis world...
except the only memorable n significant thing tat can represent all our hardwork... which is the T-shirt...
all the EDS committees are great... u all really strive so hard...
but it's just at the wrong timing... n so it end up like tis...
nyway... time will pass... n i'll overcome it.. :D

n so.... i lost d chance to help out in orientation series event...
i still remember alvin's reaction when he found out tat EDS has gone..
got a shock man... hehe
then time heal my pain... not thoroughly healed...
cz it cut off my confidence in myself n oso in organising event...
then thru sum coincidence.... kong n alvin approach me to be the assistant director for orientation camp...
shud i take tis task?? the position of "assistant director" scares me lots...
as i had a great blow with tis position...
indeed it is...

then i took sum time to make consideration....
mayb it's bcz tat i took too long time to consider.... kong actually approach sumbody else and tat person actually accepted d task...
but i wasn't being informed...
n tat's d time when i actually ad had my decision made which was i wana take over d task...
but too bad... it's not mine anymore...
i still can remember vividly tat i actually shed my tears over this incident...
hw silly i m...
but thinking back... i found out d reason behind...
it's bcz i really hope to make it a success one by becoming assistant director...
i wana overcome d hard feeling tat i had in EDS...

nyway.. things happen here n there...
then end up... kong approach me again saying tat they decided to use me..
n so i accepted of cz....

still remember the icebreaking session for our camp committees??
the first impression.... there're so many gangs in our committees...
hw shud we group up them?? a hard task for me, jimmy, kong...
nyway.. we did tried our best to find out ways to mix them together...
hope tat our hard work are being paid of...

things happen anyway...
a hard road to go thru...
choosing d date, choosing d place...
then we make it thru...
precamp.... at bukit cahaya...

i tried my best to group them up separately from their own gangs...
but... human will nvr understand n nvr put themselves in others' position...
though as predicted tat they'll hv such reaction...
yet will still get hurt..
but still ok la.. wont die.. hehe

still remember hw u all complain bout d food?? hahhhaa
all these are d photos of d precamp... sum only la.. hehe

d way u all eat during d camp.... wow... pattern banyak banyak... haha
























n my two tentmates... haha... mei kuan n pegan...
d creative pegan thot of wana stick d stickers on our shoes...
ehhe.... so cute of her...
nice to hv u all with me during d precamp... thx:D







actual camp at sungai chongkak..
scares us...
as many things are not prepared cz we nvr tested d games there..
sumore.. all my committess are not familiar with tat place...
n we dint manage to book d hall on d last day of our camp...
so many things ar!!~~~

anyway~~
all i can say is tat i hv a great team with great committees tat do will make d team high..

.
n nevertheless... i'm blessed to have my dearest campers that are so great too..
before i wake them up in d morning~~ sum of them ored acc us preparing the breakfast ad...
chatting wit us till everyone is ready for the day...
they are so nice to be taken care of.....
so co-operative.....
luv them lots....

all the games... the icebreaking...the station games with all diff diff countries... the IQ games... the bafa bafa.... the war game... n lots lots more...
memory lane of us... i wish will nvr fade....
thx for the presence... thx for the help...
though i cry like a sa po on d last day... but i really truly appreciate all ur help...
may all of us share d same memories... d good n bad ones together.. :)

:D

my holiday

three years of suffering... torturing...
31st of May...
d call of deathmaster brought him away...

though i dun really hv much memories of him
cz i was still young tat time...
d only few pieces of memories tat still vividly in my mind are those tat happened at my old house.. Jalan Duku
the one tat will never be forgotten by our family is that..
he was alwz d 1st to pay visit for every CNY..
with d old motorbike... under d hot sun...
wearing d old shirts... with d tanned skin..
n we the nieces will bring him a big bowl of dessert tat mama will alwz cook every CNY..
then only he'd go to gugong's house =)

then all d memories tat i got in my mind are those tat after his accident..
i still remember he was lying on d stretcher at hospital pantai..
with all d blood all over his face n body...
then luck was not on his side...
he fall dwn when he was recovering...
n tat was d source that cause him cudnt walk and think properly anymore..
lying on d chair, looking at d sky alone outside his house...
poor bemu still hv to take care of him though she sprained her back when carry him to bathe..

i still remember there's once he told us tat he saw his mama which was my grandmother at d nite...
we were shocked tat time... as tat was d day we were preparing for grandmother's death anniversary..
guess grandmother also worry bout his dear son...

bebe loved paos...
d pictures of him trying to fit in three paos into his mouth still in my mind... so clear....
tat was d time when he not noeing hw to differ hungry n full...
n oso d time when he cudnt really recognise us...
all we can do is jz bring him sth tat he adore lots..

time flies.. n it's true...
it's ored three years...
sum says "so pity... he was just 61 years old.." but sum says " mayb it's good for him... so tat he wont suffer anymore.."
me? i dunno... just trying my best to do as much as i can to help in d funeral...
i asked my mum tat day when we got d call bout his death,"do u still remember when was d time we got d news tat bebe accident?"
i was surprised tat mum still can remember all d sequence of d incidents...

bout papa? guess he's d one tat feel most geksim...
tis is d first time i deliver death news to sumone..
summore is to my dad...
stay strong karen... stay strong papa...
my tears flow down though i resisted it... cz my heart really shatters when i heard my papa crying on d other side of d phone when i told him bout bebe's death...
it's been hard for him for sure... noeing tat his eldest brother had passed away yet still hv to continue his work at shanghai for 7 days only bek to malaysia...
i noe there's nth i can do to ease his pain...
but all i noe is tat i hv to stay strong... stay calm... so as to help my mama n to represent papa to help in d funeral since he's not around in malaysia...
i hope wat i did for d past few weeks really help...

but who wud hv thot tat tis is not d first blow for us...
d next day of bebe's death..
early in d morning we got gonggong's call...popo's condition worsen...
we rushed to popo's house... she was shivering...
we were lost... we were so ganjiong.. wat to do... wat to do...
then without hesitating.. my mama,my sis, my cousin n d maid carry d half-conscious popo into uncle's car n rushed to hospital...
i felt bad at tat time as i cudnt help much...
cz i'm those tat will vomit when i see sumbody vomit...
n so.. all i can do is jz trying to calm d crying baby cousin tat was left at d living room...
i felt so sorry at tat time....

mama, sis n me... the three of us are lost....
we were so scared... no... no...
hw can u be so cruel, deathmaster...
u cannot take her away... no..
i prayed so hard on d way to hospital...
my hand trembling with fear... tis is d first time i felt so scared...
tis is so wrong...

dripping, injection, d pulse rate machine, blood pressure machine... all kinds... three four pipes on her hands...
i looked at my mum... she tried her best to stay calm..
n so i thot .. i must be strong... cz mama still nid me...
but i was fear cz doctor asked three of us must stayback cz things might happen at anytime...
goodness... wat shud we do?
uncles and aunties stayed in d hospital to standby.. while we go to my bebe's funeral cz no matter wat it is... we still hv to go there for a while cz it's paternal side summore papa not in...
but on d journey to bebe's house..
mama burst.... we let her sat at d passenger seats...
n she cry under d darkness... trying her best not to let us notice she was shedding tears...
she must be very tired mentally...
rushing here n there...
n worrying bout her mother tat's still lying in d hospital...
me n my sis just stay quiet... let her release her worries into tears..

popo's condition was critical for bout three days...
then gradually under d doctors' n nurses' observation... she's better ad...
i'm so glad... i feel so glad tat she's better ad....
thank god...

but d fever still will attack her...
just nw went to hospital to visit her...
her lips crack... lost weight...
so pale looking... n shivering in cold... cz having fever...
but all i can do is jz pray...
hope there's any medicine tat can lessen her pain...
let her feel better.. more comfortable...

bebe rest in peace.... popo jiayou....